Jared

KELLY: Jared seems distracted. In the last few weeks, he’s become less talkative in class and more frequently absent. He was always quiet, but now when he’s in class he just stares at the wall. Sometimes, it seems like he’s listening to something else, laughing and talking under his breath.

One time, Professor Hampton called on him to answer a question, but he said something random that didn’t have to do with the lecture. The other students laughed, but Jared’s expression didn’t change, like he was in a daze.

Recently, he turned in an assignment that was very disorganized and incomplete, where he went on a one-page tangent about the FDA.

Last week, he asked to switch class groups, saying the group members didn’t want to work with him. When Professor Hampton asked one of Jared’s group members about it, she didn’t know what he was talking about—though she did seem like she didn’t want him in the group.

Jared looks like he’s been wearing the same clothes for a while, and they’re becoming increasingly dirty and stained.

Now you play Professor Hampton and talk with Jared. Your goals are to:

1. Bring up what he’s noticed in a neutral, nonjudgmental way.

2. Ask questions to better understand Jared’s behavior. Remember that disagreeing with or contradicting a student only makes the conversation feel like an argument. Instead, try to empathize with how Jared might be feeling and the impact those feelings have on his life.

3. Finally, if necessary, refer him to mental health services, known at this school as the “counseling center.” If you are very worried about this student or any other--or if you think a student may be a danger to himself or others--offer to walk him to mental health services or call the office together.

Strong Conversation Example With Jared:

Mr. Hampton: Hi, Jared. Thanks for coming by.
Jared: (silence)
Mr. Hampton: Right... So I wanted to talk to you about something. You wrote some things in your midterm that I wanted to discuss with you.
Jared: What things?
Mr. Hampton: The comments about the FDA. What was that about?
Jared: I explained it on the exam. You know all about it.
Mr. Hampton: Actually, no. I'm not that familiar with the FDA.
Jared: Well... (leans forward, slightly lowers voice) the FDA has been promoting the use of nitrogen-based fertilizers since the 1960s. Where do we get these fertilizers? Fossil fuels, which then go into our food and our medicines. That's why the oil companies are making so much money. And our atmosphere is getting hotter. And we have dead zones in the oceans. It all fits. And why do they do this? To control us. Fatten us up so we become mindless consumers. Increase GDP. That's what it's all about.

Coach Text: It appears that Jared may have some delusional ideas. When dealing with students like this, it is advisable to neither confirm nor dispute their ideas. Instead, try to focus on how these ideas may be affecting him.

Mr. Hampton: Where did you get your information about the FDA?
Jared: Let's just say I've read a lot about it. Plus, I know someone who works there. It's all true.
Mr. Hampton: Well, it sounds like you have a lot of information on this. It must be really difficult to have this this knowledge and have to cope with it every day.
Jared: (silence)
Mr. Hampton: How do you deal with that?
Jared: (shrug)
Mr. Hampton: It seems important for you to share your ideas about the FDA, but putting them in your papers takes you off topic and affects your grade. It would help if you had someone you could talk to about these things.
Jared: (silence)
Mr. Hampton: It seems like all of this has been quite stressful for you. Is there anybody you can talk to about this?
Jared: Maybe.
Mr. Hampton: That's good. This seems like way too much stress for one person. Is there anyone we can call who could give you some support?
Jared: No. I don't want you to call anybody.
Mr. Hampton: Have any of your family members expressed concern for you?
Jared: Why? Did they talk to you?
Mr. Hampton: No, no one spoke to me. I'm only asking.
Jared: Yeah, my mom's on my case lately. But she hasn't wanted anything to do with me ever since she remarried and had her new kids, so I don't know why she's trying to get involved in my life now.
Mr. Hampton: That sounds really difficult.
Jared: It's just how it is. I know she can't wait until I get out of school so they don't have to support me anymore.
Mr. Hampton: I'm sorry to hear that.
Jared: I'm used to it.
Mr. Hampton: Have you been feeling more stressed than usual lately?
Jared: Maybe. (thinking) I think so, yes.
Mr. Hampton: Why do you think that is?
Jared: I guess you know why.
Mr. Hampton: No. I don't think I do.
Jared: Because of the textbook.
Mr. Hampton: The textbook?
Jared: You know.
Mr. Hampton: I don't.
Jared: The passage in the textbook... The one about viral marketing.
Mr. Hampton: What about it?
Jared: (shakes head) He shouldn't have done that.
Mr. Hampton: What?
Jared: He put that message to me in the textbook, where he knew I'd find it.
Mr. Hampton: Who did? The author?
Jared: That's right. Andrew Hughes.

Coach Text: Even though you may find Jared's conversation bizarre and uncomfortable, it is important to keep talking to him. Don't confirm or deny his theories but listen and respond with sincerity.

Mr. Hampton: He put a message about you in the textbook? What do you think about that?
Jared: I just thought everyone knew about it. I guess it makes me feel angry. It's just not right, that's all.

Coach Text: Great response! You can show empathy for Jared and stay focused on how he's feeling without supporting or contradicting his ideas.

Mr. Hampton: Jared, I'd really feel better if you had someone to talk to about this. I have a colleague named Donna Crawford; she works over in the Counseling Center. I think she'd be a great person for you to speak to. Why don't we walk over and see if she's available?
Jared: Uh, no...

Coach Text: Two great things you just did: (1) You referred him to a specific person at the mental health services office, which shows that you're familiar with the staff and that you trust them. (2) You offered to walk him there. That way, you can make sure he actually goes.

Mr. Hampton: Jared, you're dealing with a lot right now. You need to be strong. The people at the Counseling Center can help you with all of this stress. What do you say we walk over there?
Jared: Maybe... (nods) Yes.

End Conversation

Weak Conversation Example With Jared:

Mr. Hampton: Hi, Jared. Thanks for coming by.
Jared: (silence)
Mr. Hampton: Right... So I wanted to talk to you about something. You sometimes seem a little distracted in class. I was wondering how things are going?
Jared: Huh?
Mr. Hampton: I said, how is everything?
Jared: (nods distractedly)
Mr. Hampton: I know drugs are a common problem with students and can sometimes affect the way they think and act around others. Now, I'm only asking this to help, and I won't share your answer with anyone unless you say it's okay to, but, but I'm wondering... Have you gotten involved with drugs lately?
Jared: Just say no, Dr. Hampton. That's what I do.
Mr. Hampton: So you're not taking any drugs?
Jared: Are you trying to sell me drugs, Dr. Hampton?
Mr. Hampton: No, of course not!
Jared: (looks at professor, sizing him up)

Coach Text: This was a very unintimidating way to ask Jared if he's taking drugs. However, it is still a very personal question and could make him feel under attack, especially if you have not yet established a rapport with him.

Mr. Hampton: On your exam, it seemed to me like you were having some trouble expressing yourself. And maybe you ran out of time. But a lot of what you wrote, to me, seemed... off topic.
Jared: Like what?
Mr. Hampton: Like the stuff with the FDA. This concerns me.
Jared: Did you not know about the FDA?
Mr. Hampton: Well, it was a question about business marketing strategies, and you wrote about the FDA. Do you see how that might seem off-topic?
Jared: But it is on topic. The FDA is part of the United States government, and the government wants to control us. They've been putting nitrogen-based fertilizers in our food since the 1960s. Where do we get these fertilizers? Fossil fuels, which then go into our food and our medicines. That's why the oil companies are making so much money. And our atmosphere is getting hotter. And we have dead zones in the oceans. It all fits. And why do they do this? To control us. Fatten us up so we become mindless consumers. Increase GDP. That's what it's all about.

Coach Text: Jared's suspiciousness is worrisome. Once you get the opportunity, you should ask if he has anyone he can talk to about his ideas. This way you can see if he has a support network in place, and possibly get some contact information of someone to approach with your concerns.

Mr. Hampton: You may be a little confused. I don't think the FDA is as bad as you say it is.
Jared: How much do they pay you?
Mr. Hampton: Jared, I don't work for the FDA.
Jared: Okay.

Coach Text: Jared is exhibiting signs of paranoia, and it is very important to take an approach that will not stimulate this paranoia. Only mention things that you have observed directly, and try not to contradict ideas of his you feel are delusional. This way he will not feel like he is under attack.

Mr. Hampton: I hope you don't take this the wrong way but, have you ever seen a psychologist?
Jared: No. I don't believe in them.
Mr. Hampton: Why not?
Jared: It's all mind control. I want to keep my mind clean.

Coach Text: Asking Jared if he's seen a psychologist is a highly personal question and could damage any rapport you've build with him so far.

Mr. Hampton: Are you on any medication?
Jared: (laughs) You'd love that, wouldn't you?
Mr. Hampton: Jared, I'm serious. Are you taking anything for your... your anxiety?
Jared: No, I'm not taking anything. I don't have anxiety.

Coach Text: Asking Jared if he's on medication is extremely personal. If you ask this at all, it should only be after you have established a rapport with him.

Mr. Hampton: Are you supposed to be on medication? Have you ever been prescribed anything?
Jared: (shakes head) You're not going to put me in a hole. I won't go.
Mr. Hampton: It seems like all of this has been quite stressful for you. Is there anybody you can talk to about this?
Jared: Maybe.
Mr. Hampton: That's good. This seems like way too much stress for one person. Is there anyone we can call who could give you some support?
Jared: No. I don't want you to call anybody.
Mr. Hampton: Jared, I'd really feel better if you had someone to talk to about this. I have a colleague named Donna Crawford; she works over in the Counseling Center. I think she'd be a great person for you to speak to. Why don't we walk over and see if she's available?
Jared: Uh, no...
Mr. Hampton: If you did decide to go to the Counseling Center, it could be your secret, something you do and only you know about.
Jared: Yeah.
Mr. Hampton: So you'll go? Just tell me you'll go and I'll stop hassling you.
Jared: Sure. Of course I'll go.

Coach Text: Jared shows signs of delusional thinking and paranoia. Therefore, it is necessary to get him to the mental health services office as soon as possible. Accepting his word that he will go is not enough. In this case, you should try to get him to walk over with you.

End Conversation (failed to walk him to Counseling Center)

KELLY: During this conversation, it became clear that Jared does need to be evaluated. He may have told you about his suspicions regarding the FDA, or about his belief that the textbook author is trying to communicate with him through certain passages. Both are indicators of paranoia and extreme stress. Plus, he seemed distracted, and responded in ways that didn’t make logical sense.

In the conversations, Jared may not have agreed to go to counseling, and sometimes that happens. However, because of the seriousness of his symptoms, it’s extremely important to call the dean of students and possibly your school’s behavior intervention team, and tell them your concerns. They can advise on next steps. Students with symptoms this severe must be brought to the attention of others on campus.

Here are some useful takeaways from this conversation:

1. Don’t argue with a student’s false ideas.
When talking with students who have strongly felt but false or delusional ideas, try not to argue with them over the validity of those ideas. If your goal is to express concern and make a referral, the student’s ideas themselves are less important than how those ideas are making them feel. You could say, “It must be hard to live with that knowledge. How are you handling it?”

2. Provide information about mental health services.
Not all students will agree to go to the mental health services office. However, providing basic information can overcome some hesitations:

Contact information, such as the phone number and location
An explanation of how counseling works and how much it costs (at most universities, it is free for students)
The popularity of the service (on a national level, almost 20% of college students use these services at some point)

3. Know the resources at your school:

If you think a student is a threat to himself or others, try to walk him to mental health services--if you feel safe and comfortable doing so.
Otherwise, or if the student won’t go, call the Dean of Students Office and/or your school’s behavior intervention team to make them aware of the student’s behaviors. In an emergency, call 911.
Never keep a student in your office against their will or take any action that might feel risky or dangerous to your own safety.
Check the Resources section for appropriate referral points at your institution.