EMMA: Hey, Charlie.
CHARLIE: Emma! I just got dared to do the wildest thing. Here's what's gonna happen: I'm boutta chug this beer, climb up to the roof, and backflip off it. It's gonna be SICK!
EMMA: (yawns) Sure is getting late, huh? I'm pretty tired.
CHARLIE: Seriously, dude? Sounds like somebody needs to grab an energy drink from the fridge, mix it with some vodka, and meet me on the roof!
COACH: You tried to subtly suggest that Charlie should leave the party. He didn't seem to get your point. A more direct approach might be more effective in this particular situation.
EMMA: Dude, you're embarrassing yourself.
CHARLIE: Wow. Maybe you're just being a buzzkill! Ever think about that?
COACH: You tried to convince Charlie to leave by telling him he's embarrassing himself. A gentler approach might be more effective in this situation.
EMMA: Charlie, you're also embarrassing me!
CHARLIE: Well, if you're so embarrassed, maybe you should leave. But I think I wanna stay here with my real friends, you know, people who aren't embarrassed by my existence.
EMMA: You know I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry. I'm just trying to help you, dude.
COACH: You told Charlie he was embarrassing you, and that didn't seem to make him want to leave. A different approach might be to focus on what would encourage Charlie to want to leave the party.
CHARLIE: I mean. I just don't wanna leave yet, okay? I'm having fun. Fun times.
EMMA: Hey, the sooner we leave, the sooner we can binge watch Lion Lords: Lions Who Are Lords.
CHARLIE: Oh man, everybody's talking about that show! I've been meaning to watch it, but I don't think I'm quite ready to call it a night.
COACH: You tried to distract Charlie with something you both enjoy.
EMMA: We're leaving in 15 minutes and watching it with or without you.
CHARLIE: Fine, then. Go.
EMMA: Charlie. Don't be like that.
COACH: You were direct, but Charlie thought you were being judgmental. When in doubt, a supportive approach usually works best. Suggesting that you stay for a few more minutes, and then leave might make him want to leave with you, which will help him stay safe.
CHARLIE: Alright. No backflip. But how about some drinks? No? More for me.
EMMA: How 'bout you walk back home with me and Kev? I always feel a little on edge at night.
CHARLIE: Yeah, sure. Do we have to leave right now though? Er, can't you just go with Kev? I'm not really ready to leave yet.
EMMA: Kevin lives closer, so I'll still have to walk like 10 minutes by myself. And we live in the same building, dude.
CHARLIE: What, we do? When did that happen?
EMMA: Ha ha.
COACH: Making it sound like Charlie would be doing you a favor by leaving with you is a great way to convince him to leave.
EMMA: Can you just do this one thing for me? Please?
CHARLIE: What, like I don't do other stuff for you? What about when Cam dumped you, and I had to pick you up from the dining hall, and for some reason, all right, that's, you were just COVERED in barbecue sauce. Okay, okay, I remember! I just meant like, right now. Can you do this for me right now?
COACH: You implied Charlie wasn't a good friend. Since you all came to the party together, a more effective approach might be to suggest you all leave together as well.
CHARLIE: I mean, I guess I'm starting to get a little worn out. But only cause you've been killing my vibe.
EMMA: Sure.
CHARLIE: Don't hate the player, man. Hate the game. Anyway, lemme just grab one more drink.
EMMA: Dude, you're a little sloppy. You definitely don't need any more drinks.
CHARLIE: Um, last time I checked you weren't my mom. But whatever.
COACH: You directly told Charlie that he should stop drinking, but you described him as 'sloppy' which could hurt his feelings. A different approach might be to point out that most people at the party have stopped drinking.
CHARLIE: I just don't wanna leave yet, we can still hang out for a while! It's not even that late. Some people are still dancing and stuff!
EMMA: No.
EMMA: Let's get out of here, before you embarrass yourself by trying to convince everyone you can breakdance, like last time. First of all, I wasn't that bad. Secondly, thanks for reminding me of that! Wanna talk about when I peed my pants in 3rd grade, toooo? Huh?
EMMA: No, I just, you don't gotta try and control me. I'm an adult.
EMMA: I'm sorry, dude.
CHARLIE: Whatever. But.
CHARLIE: (sighs) Fine. Let's just go.
COACH: You reminded Charlie of something embarrassing he did the last time he was drunk. A different approach might be to remind him that there's always another night, it's not like this is the last time the two of you can go out and have fun.
COACH: Reminding Charlie that you can always go to another party on another day is a good way to convince him to leave.