So, we can’t arrest our way out of this. And that leads us to ask, what can we do? For a long time, I thought the trauma that underlies youth behaviors was a problem for social services, certainly not law enforcement. But then I realized the enormous impact we do have in stopping the cycle of trauma and delinquency.
When we step into a young person’s life, we can respond to problematic behavior in two ways -- Either with arrest, detention, and other types of punishment and restraint, which perpetuate the cycle of trauma and the culture of mistrust or by connecting and building a relationship to support and empower the young person. Let’s look closer at how to do this, and then you’ll get a chance to practice having an effective interaction with a virtual young person.
The first step in connecting and building relationships is to realize that law enforcement is not a welcome presence for everyone. Families with histories of abuse and trauma may have high mistrust or anger towards law enforcement. Adolescents, in particular, are keenly aware of authority, and those with trauma histories may respond to you with a trauma reaction like fight, freeze, or flight; or a combination of all three.
I know you may have standard operating procedures you must follow, and of course personal and public safety is a priority. However, by recognizing that some law enforcement procedures by their very nature can be traumatizing, you can shift your approach in ways that make a big difference. For example, sometimes we need to make sure a young person doesn’t have a weapon. An order to “put up your hands!” can make the young person uncertain about whether to respond with fight, freeze, or flight. Instead, I’ve found it helps to put my hands out to model the behavior I want, and then say, “Please, would you mind putting your hands out like this, so we can see we’re both safe.” Small changes like this actually make a big difference.
Then, to build rapport, you can ask the young person questions about their life or how they like to spend their free time.
Once you’ve built some relationship, explain why you need to speak with them. Be conscious of the questions and the custodial considerations from the perspective of the youth. And, of course, if you’re interviewing a juvenile suspect or witness, be mindful of your jurisdictional laws. I’ve found that showing respect and support for teens helps build trust and encourage cooperation. There are four techniques you can use to help teens open up. These are asking open-ended questions, using reflective listening, identifying feelings, and providing affirmations.
Open-ended questions like, “Tell me more about that” or, “What’s been going on at home?” encourage the young person to open up.
Reflective listening means summarizing what the adolescent says in your own words. This clarifies your understanding and shows that you’re listening. For example, if a teen says, “I hate cops; you’re always bothering me!” a response might be, “In the past, cops have bothered you and people you know.”
Identifying feelings means putting the teen’s emotions into words and validating what they’re feeling. You can use phrases like, “You seem…” or “You sound...” For example, “You seem upset about the loss of your grandfather” or “You sound angry that they made fun of you.”
Finally, all youth have strengths and successes, but so often we only talk about what they’re doing wrong. Using affirmations to praise youth for their strengths encourages cooperation. When teens exhibit good behavior or good decision-making, praise them for it, like “I appreciate your ability to talk to me and be honest about this.”
Now let’s look at an example interaction between an officer named Harjo and the teen you read about earlier, Jacob Bigbear.
Officer Harjo was patrolling the grounds of a festival when a vendor approached him and told him someone just walked off with a shirt from his table without paying for it. He described a male American Indian teen wearing a shirt with a basketball logo. The vendor said he just needs his merchandise back and doesn't want to press charges. Officer Harjo has identified a teen who fits the description.
First, let’s look at what happens when Officer Harjo does not take the time to build a relationship with the teen and does not take a respectful or supportive tone.
OFFICER: Hey, I need to talk to you for a minute about something.
JACOB: (suspiciously). Okay. What’s up?
OFFICER: One of the vendors here just told me a t-shirt was taken from his stand. He described a teenager wearing a shirt like yours, with a basketball logo. I’m trying to get his merchandise back. Did you take a shirt without paying for it?
JACOB: Uh, no, what the hell?
JACOB'S THOUGHT: Man, please don’t ask me to open my backpack.
SERGEANT REDBIRD: Notice how immediately identifying Jacob as a suspect made him feel threatened and vulnerable. That could make it harder for him to open up to Officer Harjo.
OFFICER: Hey, you need to calm down and watch your mouth when you’re talking to me.
JACOB: Yeah, whatever.
OFFICER: You think it was someone else. Why would he describe someone who looks just like you?
JACOB: Damn, I dunno. Maybe he didn’t see right. Maybe he should check his glasses.
SERGEANT REDBIRD: Notice how Officer Harjo’s attempts to back Jacob into a corner aren’t making him any more cooperative. Instead, they’re making him angry and defensive.
OFFICER: So, look, you have two options. Option 1 is to return the shirt and apologize. Option 2 is to take a ride with me to detention, end up in juvy, miss school, and be away from your family. Which do you choose?
JACOB: Well, I don’t care about school and I didn’t take anything.
OFFICER: So you’re gonna stick with your story and go with option 2. Come on, man. You don’t want to go this route. I’m telling you, return the shirt and apologize. Or don’t and it’s going to be a very bad day.
JACOB: Look, I didn’t take it, so just do what you have to do. I don’t care, whatever.
OFFICER: Okay then. Let’s go for a ride to the station.
SERGEANT REDBIRD: A likely ending to this scenario would be Jacob being processed and charged for obstructing justice. He would be held at a detention center until his mother could be located to sign for his release. The interaction and subsequent detention would likely reinforce Jacob’s anger and sense of helplessness, and fuel his distrust of law enforcement.
This interaction with Jacob went poorly because Officer Harjo made choices to immediately identify him as the suspect and incriminate him, asserting his authority in the process. This made Jacob feel threatened and triggered his protective behaviors, resulting in an outcome that was further traumatizing to him and may lead to further delinquent acts in the future.
Now let’s look at what happens when Officer Harjo takes the time to build a relationship with Jacob, taking a respectful and supportive tone.
OFFICER: Hey, my name is Officer Harjo. How are you doing today?
JACOB: Oh, I’m fine.
OFFICER: What’s your name?
JACOB: Jacob.
OFFICER: Jacob, what is your last name?
JACOB: Bigbear.
JACOB'S THOUGHT: Damn, why is this cop talking to me? There’s no way that guy saw me take his shirt.
OFFICER: I think I’ve met some of your family, I met a Jacob Bigbear Senior at a ceremony.
JACOB: Yeah, that’s my grandfather.
OFFICER: Okay, yeah, so I’ve met your grandfather then.
SERGEANT REDBIRD: This is a relaxed and non-confrontational way to beging the conversation.Sharing any connection you may have to a youth’s family helps build rapport and trust. Also, when dealing with teens, it’s best to separate them from their peers so they don’t feel a need to appear “in control.”
OFFICER: Do you come here every year?
JACOB: Yeah.
OFFICER: Hey, me too. What have you been up to?
JACOB: Hanging out. I just had some fry bread from over there.
OFFICER: One of my cousins sells Indian tacos out of his truck. They’re pretty great.
JACOB: Oh, yeah, they’re good.
OFFICER: Who are you here with today?
JACOB: My family’s around here somewhere.
OFFICER: Okay, you came here with your family.
JACOB: Yeah, with my sisters and cousins.
JACOB'S THOUGHT: Well, he’s not freaking out on me, so maybe it’s okay.
OFFICER: So, I’m checking things out around here, and I heard from a vendor that someone took a t-shirt from his table and didn’t pay for it. Do you know anything about a t-shirt being taken?
JACOB: No.
OFFICER: Okay. Heard any kids talk about taking stuff from the vendors?
JACOB: Nope.
JACOB'S THOUGHT: Man, please don’t ask me to open my backpack.
SERGEANT REDBIRD: Using an indirect approach like this is less threatening to youth. Jacob isn’t being forthcoming, but he isn’t being difficult, either. Confronting or accusing Jacob could provoke a trauma reaction of fight, flight, or freeze.
OFFICER: Do you know any of the people working here?
JACOB: Uh, I think so. My friend’s cousin sells blankets and stuff.
OFFICER: Yeah, it’s important for these vendors to make money today so they can take care of their families.
JACOB: (shrugs) Yeah, I guess.
OFFICER: So, look, I was speaking to that vendor, and he really needs the t-shirt back. He has to take care of his family, and he needs the money from it. I have the option to take care of this so that no one gets charged or arrested. I’m just trying to sort this out and get it back for him.
JACOB: Look, it’s not even for me. It’s for my little sister.
OFFICER: Okay, so you took the shirt for her.
JACOB: Yeah, she… needs clean clothes, and I wanted to cheer her up. It’s her birthday.
JACOB'S THOUGHT: Ugh, nothing ever works out for my family.
SERGEANT REDBIRD: Here, it payed off to use a non-judgmental approach, and to help Jacob empathize with the vendors. It made him comfortable enough to be honest.
OFFICER: Who takes care of you and your sister?
JACOB: I do. I have two sisters I take care of.
OFFICER: Okay. What are things like for you at home?
JACOB: I live with my mom and my grandpa and my sisters. My grandpa’s sick and he can’t do much. So I take care of things.
OFFICER: It's tough when you can't count on your parents. You have to grow up too fast.
JACOB: Yeah, well, at least my sisters have me to look out for them. My grandpa does what he can, but it’s hard for him.
OFFICER: It would help me to know more about your life. What’s been going on at home?
JACOB: Well, mom’s not doing good right now. My uncle died and she says she needs time to not think about it. So she parties. And she doesn’t think about us when she’s partying. She doesn’t think about doing laundry... or remembering birthdays.
JACOB'S THOUGHT: I bet mom’s so wasted. She’s gonna unload on me later if she finds out about this.
SERGEANT REDBIRD: Here, Officer Harjo asked “What are things like for you at home?” and “What’s been going on at home?”, which are open-ended questions. He also identified Jacob’s feeling of having to grow up too fast. Both of these techniques helped build trust and encouraged Jacob to open up.
OFFICER: Things have been really hard at home since your uncle passed, and your mom hasn’t been around much.
JACOB: Yeah, it sucks. Nothing ever goes right for my family. And I don’t like it when she parties.
OFFICER: That sounds really tough. Thank you for sharing; it takes courage to be honest like that with me.
JACOB: (a little upbeat with a hesitant smile) Yeah… all right.
SERGEANT REDBIRD: Officer Harjo reflected what he heard about his mom not being around much, which encouraged Jacob to open up even more. And he affirmed Jacob’s courage in being honest. Affirming a teen’s good choices encourages them to keep making them.
OFFICER: Okay, look... How about you give the shirt back to the vendor and apologize to him. Because he’s just trying to take care of his family.
JACOB: (sigh) Yeah, alright...
SERGEANT REDBIRD: After Jacob returned the vendor’s property, Officer Harjo gave him a ride home. With Jacob in the front seat, they continued to talk about his home life. When they got to his house, Officer Harjo saw that it was in pretty bad shape. Broken windows were taped up, and it seemed like someone had kicked a hole in the front door. When he wrote his report, he made referrals to child welfare and family services. He also made a note for the evening patrol officer to do a well-child check at Jacob’s home.
Because Officer Harjo payed attention to Jacob’s situation and identified his needs, he was able to resolve the situation without traumatizing Jacob. He was also able to refer the family for support, which may reduce the likelihood of further delinquent acts.
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